Freaks

Journal entry. April 16, 2011. Life BC.

“Did one of your friends give me the evil eye last night?”
“Do you believe in the evil eye.”

I remember watching an episode of SATC called The Freak Show. I had an inkling Frank was one of these men but I persisted because I was determined to fall in love again god damn it. Our romantic first meeting was something to tell the kids, but ended with a public spat at my local Grill’d burger house. I met Frank at the movies; one of my favourite hideouts. I loved going to see films alone, mostly because I didn’t have the patience to coordinate times, juggle everyone’s likes and dislikes and then have to apologise to my film date if they hated my wacky choice. The night I met Frank I’d booked to see Biutiful with Javier Bardem and selected my seat online; E7. When I walked into the cinema, Frank was sitting in the seat I’d booked; and the crazy unfolded from there.

I went to a friends birthday drinks in Brunswick last night. I felt strong and beautiful for the first time in a very long time. I’d asked Frank to come along but he never replied to my text, but between a mouthful of pizza and a sip of wine I turned to see him standing a few metres behind me. It worried me that this strange man I’d known for a combined total of 7 hours had thought it was alright to show up and surprise me. Before he vanished he took my hand and placed it inside his, without asking. Was he the freak or was I?

After he left we moved on to the Retreat; a place that still reminds of happy days with Charlie. The Pixies came on and our song boomed through the old dusty speakers. This one song had the ability to eradicate pain and warm my cold shitty heart. Outside there’s a box car waiting;  I was 27 again and madly in love.